You’ve seen it in the movies and on TV. Two teenage lovers are making out, but the girl decides not to go any further. As she exits the car or demands her partner drive her home, he complains. “But babe, you’ve got my so turned on. What about these blue balls?”
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Maybe you’ve even been on the receiving end, when a partner tries to convince you to go further than you’d like because of his physical discomfort.
But are blue balls really real? And how serious are they, really?
What Are Blue Balls, Exactly?
Blue balls actually are a thing, and the medical term for it is “vasocongestion.”
Less frequently, some doctors call this condition “epididymal hypertension.” What this means is that the blood vessels around the testicles and penis have become filled with blood, which happens during arousal. Blue balls typically accompanies an erection, and these are often the only symptoms of blue balls. Without the release of orgasm, it can be painful or uncomfortable for some men.
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The level of discomfort caused varies between men. It can be painful or it may be almost unnoticeable. Similarly, many men may not experience blue balls at all. With this in mind, you should know that a man who claims that you owe him anything for giving him blue balls might be lying or exaggerating the effect.
And he can always take care of the issue himself, of course, with some masturbation. (Side Note: Here are some great masturbation tips you can use to scratch your own itch)
You may have had partners who complain about blue balls, but it certainly won’t kill them, and besides, you should never feel guilty or pressured into having sex. It’s normal for partners to have different sex drives. You might feel stressed with work or simply tired and want to pass. Blue balls is also not a good excuse to introduce sex into a relationship earlier than you would prefer.
However, you don’t have to worry that your partner will suffer much without you intervening. Even without orgasm, blue balls will subside over time as blood returns back to normal circulation. In fact, you’ve probably experienced similar effects if you’ve ever become aroused but were unable to get off. You might be uncomfortable, but you’ve probably gone on with your day without thinking about it too much.
Using Blue Balls to Your Advantage…Seriously!
Of course, being aroused for a prolonged period of time or being brought to the cliff of arousal only to have your partner back off can be quite titillating, which is one answer to the question “What are blue balls good for?”. Many men and women enjoy being teased to the point where they’re close to orgasm, only to have their partners stop orally or manually stimulating them.
Repeating this several times can lead to intense orgasms when he finally does cum. (More great tips on having powerful orgasms yourself in this guide)
You can practice these tease and denial activities by stimulating your partner. Starting with flirty messages (like these ones), naughty emails or steamy phone calls (great phone sex tips here) while you’re apart if you can. When you’re together, you can brush your hand against his body, moving closer to his more sensitive areas like his cock. Long and lingering kisses are sure to send his mind in the right direction, too (great kissing advice in this video). Lap dances and strip teasing (this guide will show you how) are a perfect way to lead him to that precipice.
As things heat up, you can certainly stimulate him manually or orally. Your man might even enjoy having sex with you, but don’t let him cum too quickly! The aim is to bring him nearly to the edge, then to back off. Bondage works especially well for these activities because he won’t be able to control pace or intensity himself, and he can’t reach down to his penis to finish off the job (if you are looking for tips on dominating him, then check out this article).
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During those times when you’ve backed off, you can focus on your pleasure. Instead of administering oral sex to him (tips for giving a great blow job here), you can be on the receiving end. You can use him to reach orgasm, and you can even make him watch while you masturbate and get off (more powerful fingering techniques here).
Sessions like these are sure to drive your man crazy, so don’t be surprised if he complains, even playfully, about blue balls or how hard his cock is. If you’ve got a dominant streak in you at all, you might enjoy knowing how much you’re turning him on.
Repeat the stimulating and abating game until you’re ready to let your lover cum. Then, you can proceed to suck and lick his cock or ride him until you’re both experiencing waves of pleasure and collapse together in a sweaty heap.
Remember that blue balls can be quite uncomfortable for some men, however. If your partner is one of those, he might not enjoy these games. On the other hand, he might not care at all about his blue balls and really enjoy the games. The key is experimenting.
Furthermore, it may be difficult for some men to prevent themselves from ejaculating when they’re so turned on. This might cause your game to last much shorter than anticipated. However, you should accept it as a form of flattery. Enjoy playing with your man and torturing him with blue balls if you can!
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