For many people who want to spice up their sex lives, anal play makes sense. But you might be wondering what you would get out of it as a receiver. Did you know that many people are able to achieve anal orgasm? In fact, this is why some men and women love being on the receiving end. Plus, providing your lover with that kind of pleasure can be addicting.
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There’s no one single way for you to come to anal orgasm — pun intended. But this means you can have fun enjoying a variety of anal stimulation as both the receiver and as the giver of pleasure to your man. Now, let’s learn the best ways to achieve an anal orgasm (Read: How To Have Anal Orgasms).
Fingering isn’t just good vaginally. Anal fingering is a great way to test the waters of penetration slowly. You can start with a single finger and add more. Anal fingering can also simply mean stimulating in and around your rosebud without penetration, which is great if either you or your partner is squeamish about the idea. Even though fingers are smaller than a penis or a dildo, you should keep plenty of lube on hand.
It’s also important that fingernails are trimmed short and filed of any sharp edges that could cause pain (these are good tips to prevent anal from hurting). Slipping fingers into a condom or a medical glove — as long as you have no latex allergy — can help to increase comfort during anal fingering, too.
Salad tossing is the euphemism for anal licking, which you might know better as giving a rim job (more on that here). We’ve got a great article with tips to prepare for salad tossing as the receiver and the giver. A dental dam is a great way to protect from negative experiences and possible bacteria transmission, and it allows you to stimulate one of your partner’s more erogenous zones in an intimate manner!
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You can prepare for a rim job by showering and cleansing with a wet wipe beforehand. For extra protection, warm water in a douche will leave you feeling squeaky clean; although, you can perform an enema for the ultimate in cleanliness. This allows you to enjoy anal orgasms without worrying about any potential fecal matter or bad smells.
There are plenty of anal toys available, and butt plugs are among the most popular! The basic shape of a buttplug is similar to the spade symbol on a deck of cards, with a tapered end that you insert. This grows to a bulge and then slims to a thin neck, followed by a flared base, which makes it safe for anal play. Some have angled shapes, often for prostate stimulation, multiple bulges or texture. Some vibrate.
Butt plugs are intended to be inserted and remain in position. They provide a general filling sensation. You can wear a butt plug during vaginal sex or masturbation or even around the house while doing chores! Click here for more ideas when using butt plugs.
Another popular type of anal sex toy is a chain of bulges known as anal beads. All the beads might be the same size or they may increase in size to provide stimulation as you insert them and pull them out. Make sure to lube your anal beads sufficiently before popping them in, and follow these tips to choose the right set of anal beads.
- Anal beads should be made of a body-safe material such as silicone.
- The connecting material should also be made of silicone.
- There should be a handle or loop to safely remove them.
Check out more info on anal sex safety.
There are a variety of other sex toys that you can use to have anal orgasms. These include dildos and vibrators. Many toys designed for G-spot stimulation can be adapted to stimulate the prostate, for example. However, you should not use any toy without a flared base or shape — a C shape, for example — that could possibly become lost inside the body. No one wants a trip to the emergency room!
If you’re using sex toys anally that you also like for vaginal use, you should never go directly from ass to vagina. Use condoms that you can remove or simply choose toys that can be safely disinfected before you use them vaginally. Otherwise, you can transmit bacteria and cause a nasty vaginal infection! It’s generally unwise to use household items as an anal dildo.
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Materials that can be sterilized include silicone, glass, stainless steel, treated wood, plastic and ceramic. Boiling any toy without a motor for three minutes will remove any bacteria you can’t see. You can also toss them in the top rack of your dishwasher. However, vibrators should be sprayed with a 10% bleach solution to clean after anal usage.
Strap-ons provide a great way for you to stimulate your partner to anal orgasm. Strapping on a sexy dildo or vibrator can make you feel powerful in ways you didn’t imagine, which is great for power roleplay (and one of the reasons guys like having anal sex). However, it’s also ideal for stimulating his prostate, especially if you choose a dildo that’s got a curved head. The prostate, which is about two inches in, is curved toward his stomach, so make sure you’re positioning the dildo correctly.
Check out our advice for massaging his prostate.
Strap-ons are used with a harness. There are many types of harnesses, but the standard design is created in different sizes, so you can get one that fits your hips. Harnesses come with permanent or replaceable O-rings, to which a standard dildo with a flared base fits. If the O-ring is replaceable, you can get a ring that’s compatible with your favorite dildo. Some harnesses also come with their own dildo or set of dildos.
One manufacturer makes Vac-U-Lock harnesses, which use suction to secure. You’ll want to avoid Vac-U-Lock attachments made from anything other than silicone because these materials are porous and retain bacteria even after you wash them with soap and water. However, you can find silicone attachments to work with the Vac-U-Lock system.
Of course, the ultimate penetrative act to bring yourself to anal orgasm is anal sex. As the recipient, you get to feel filled like never before. Either you or your partner can add clitoral stimulation to help you cum more easily, or you can experience double penetration with your partner’s penis in your anus and your favorite sex toy used vaginally. You can swap the position if that feels more comfortable to you.
Your approach to anal sex should be slow and thoughtful, not reckless. Make sure you’re relaxed and comfortable. Take time for plenty of foreplay. An orgasm or two before anal sex can make it more easy to have anal orgasms, especially if you find it easy to have multiple orgasms. More on that here.
You can work your way up to the size of your partner’s penis or a larger toy by using smaller toys and fingers. This is known as anal training. More about that here.
Pushing down with your anal muscles when your partner first penetrates you can actually make it easier even though the opposite seems to be true.
You should always use lube when having anal sex because the anus doesn’t self-lubricate.
Finally, communication is essential to having pleasurable anal sex whether or not you experience anal orgasm. Your partner should be willing to slow down or stop at your request. Anal sex might be uncomfortable, especially at first, but it shouldn’t be outright painful or cause bleeding.
Just in case you were wondering, you can’t get pregnant from anal sex.
Finding What Works For You to Have Anal Orgasms
Although there a ton of techniques to use that might be pleasurable, not all of them will give you anal orgasms. You may simply not like some of them. Furthermore, you might like stimulation that your partner doesn’t like. All of that is okay!
Another thing to factor in is how you’re feeling. If you’re ill or having GI distress, it’s probably not a good idea to participate in heavy anal stimulation, especially anything that involves penetration. It’s important to pay attention to your body no matter how much you might want to have an anal orgasm.
You might be pleasantly surprised, however, at how much you like anal stimulation. Some women even prefer it to vaginal penetration and like to experiment with anal masturbation! And enjoying that type of intimacy with your man can bring you closer together. However, not everyone is able to achieve an anal orgasm and some people will never be comfortable with butt play. Wherever you fall on the spectrum, it’s fine!
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